Wednesday, September 26, 2012


My furry monster, Lilly, gained a pound!! She's just over 7pounds now and I'm so tickled!

I took her to the vet again and made sure she saw the doctor there that I actually trust with my kits. I told him everything that had been going on and my concerns that there was no definitive diagnosis and that what I had been told wasn't really explaining things that were happening with her.

Here's what he concluded. With the thinning fur, weight loss, out of whack blood values... his experience tells him it's some type of endocrine disorder. It could be hyperthyroid disease, diabetes or Cushing's disease. But come to find out, with cats sometimes the signs/symptoms can show years before the blood work truly shows the underlying cause. For now, she's staying on Prednosolone, Reglan and a vitamin supplement. She got a B12 shot on the chance that may also help. He recommends repeating the blood work every six months until the cause can be determined. If she continues to gain weight and improve a bit, we'll start weaning her off the steroid.

Also discovered is why she has that bulge in the middle. He said that one thing steroids can do is make the muscles more lax. It's not that anything is getting that big inside her, just that the abdominal muscles aren't holding everything as tightly. He said while her liver is enlarged, its shape hasn't changed so it's not as much of a worry. HE didn't find any kind of mass and he did a lot of squeezing on the belly, much to Lilly's intense dislike. ;)

I love that he doesn't just nod and say "Mmm hmm" to the stuff I say or ask. He explains and gives me answers and understands just because I'm your basic cat mom, I'm not an idiot or ignorant on things that can happen with cats.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Why Say Choice?

Below is a particularly poignant performance of Adam Lambert's "Outlaws of Love." One of the first things that comes to mind on this is why do people think it's a choice? WHY would anyone CHOOSE to be the victim?

Gay men are subject to verbal and physical abuse, society looks down on them, they are murdered and the culprits are not punished sometimes as they would be if they'd killed a "normal" person. Churches tell them they're evil, even sometimes their OWN churches that they have attended for years. The government doesn't recognize them as equal citizens. In many states is is COMPLETELY LEGAL to fire someone for the simple fact they are gay. Most states don't recognize same-sex marriage and therefore, partners are not receiving the full benefit of what should be a basic right. And the federal government recognizes NOTHING related to same-sex marriage. DADT may be gone (praying it STAYS gone!) but the military partners who marry have no true rights unless they also obtain power of attorney for each other. A simple marriage for a male/female couple becomes a legal road trip for a same-sex couple.

It's truly shameful for people to believe someone would choose a life that puts them in harm's way so much. I applaud the men who are open about their orientation for they are braver than me. They are taking a stand to say "I am who I am and I'm not ashamed". They are heroes.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Something You Never Want to Plan

I start crying every time I try to think of this. My furry monster is dying. Lilly's liver is enlarging and it's not something she is going to recover from. I've got to accept the fact that my furry monster is going to leave me well before I'm ready to let her go. And I've got to have a plan.

If she goes down late at night or on a weekend, the vet isn't open and there isn't a local emergency vet. I won't be looking for life-saving measures though. Just a way to release her from her pain if it happens that way. Then there is after. Cremation. How the hell do you plan something like this while looking at her sleeping peacefully on the end table?

I've lost one cat, Tigger, but it was suddenly. She'd been sick, but her dying was sudden. An asthma attack hit while I was asleep and when one of the other kits woke me, she was taking her last breaths. I was hysterical. Now I've got to watch and wait KNOWING it's coming, just not when. It could be a week or a month. I doubt she'll see Yule though. It'd be nice if she made it to her 7 year Gotcha Day anniversary on Samhain.

My Maine Coon mix now weighs less than my 21 year old tabby. She's barely over six pounds and feels like a skeleton in most places. Her weight loss just sets off the bulge now becoming evident at the bottom of her rib cage. It's her liver getting too big. No idea what happened to cause it or if it would have happened no matter what. She is still eating to a small degree and is on two medications, about to be three. An iron supplement is being added as she's become anemic. But it's just putting off the inevitable. My daughter is going to die. My furry little child is going to be gone too soon. Always so full of life and fun. A purring lap blanket who saved my heart when I lost Tigger.

I'll never have another tortie in my house. Losing another is going to kill me.