Monday, April 23, 2012

Bye Girl

In September or so 1997, I bought a car. A used 1991 Chevrolet Cavalier. The memories that car holds for me. The furthest I've driven from home, north (Pineville) and south (Sumter) were in that car. First time I gave/got a hand job. First time I damned near got caught drunk driving. First time I drove in snow. In one way or another, I drove that car to meet every guy I've ever been with. I paid about $6000 for her and put about $2000 or more in her over the years to keep her going. I sat in the parking lot at work peeling the clear coat off when it started chipping. Gods only know how many other things with that car were a first and I'm just not remembering now.

I signed the title over to Brian a few months ago. Brian thought I'd cry then. Nope. But I did today. His parents bought a battery and took it today. I cried a bit seeing my baby and all my memories roll away.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Gay Movie List

I belong to a group that has started a movie thread on gay movies. Just trying to keep up with what I've seen or want to see. There are several in here that I know I won't watch. But if others see this they might want to, so I've left them in.


 9 Dead Gay Guys


 10 Attitudes


 A Home at the End of the World


 A Single Man


 A Very British Sex Scandal


 A Very Natural Thing


 A Summer Dress (short)


 Adam & Steve


 Alkali, Iowa


 All Over the Guy --- was good, but damned if I can remember how it ended...


 Almost Normal


 An Angel Named Billy --- good story but bad dialogue, acting and music


 And The Band Played On --- more dealing with the arrival of HIV/Aids than romance


 An Englishman In New York --- interesting though I haven't seen the intro (The Naked Civil Servant)


 Angels In America


 Another Country --- took a look but it didn't catch my attention


 Another Gay Movie --- too beyond stupid to watch

 Back Soon --- unusual but very sweet, HEA kind of


 Beautiful Boxer --- wonderful story


 Beautiful Thing --- beautiful movie! HEA


 Bedrooms & Hallways --- a bit strange, but still pretty good


 Bent --- strange and no HEA


 Big Eden --- excellent!


 Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss --- not too bad, no real HEA


 Bishonen (Love Between Beautiful Youths)


 Borstol Boy


 Boy


 Boy Culture --- pretty good, HEA


 Boys Live 7 --- the only one I watched (almost) all of... think they're all depressing


 Breakfast with Scot --- very cute!


 Brokeback Mountain --- no HEA but a good story


 Camp --- sort of a coming of age movie


 Caravaggio


 Chicken Tikka Masala --- silly and funny, HEA


 Clapham Junction


 Coffee Date


 Cote D'Azur --- technically a HEA but a strange way to get there


 Coming Out --- cannot find with english subtitles


 Cowboys & Angels


 C.R.A.Z.Y. --- realistic, no real HEA, but the guy has peace


 Crutch


 David's Birthday --- total side-swiping ending! 


 Defying Gravity --- a bit sweet, a bit sad, HEA


 Denied --- kind of an open ending, not a bad film


 Different For Girls --- post-op female, a bit strange, HEA


 DO COMEÇO AO FIM --- for some, possibly a forbidden movie, HEA


 Dorian Blues --- ok, but the ending was anti-climatic


 Dream Boy --- good movie, but no HEA


 Du Er Ikke Alene (You Are Not Alone) --- unusual, possibly forbidden, sort of HEA


 Dog Tags 


 East Side Story


 Eating Out --- caved and watched it, it's actually good!

 Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds --- took two tries to watch, but worth it!

 Eating Out: All You Can Eat --- silly and cute

 Eating Out: Drama Camp --- sweet and cute


 Eden's Curve --- told no HEA, but haven't seen


 Edge of Seventeen --- not really an HEA, but the guy comes out ok.


 Eleven Men Out


 Eyes Wide Open --- knew an ending I wouldn't like was coming so didn't watch it all


 Fashion Victims


 Fish Out Of Water --- discusses whether homosexuality is actually a sin or not


 Fit --- examines the appearance of gay or straight, insightful, excellent movie


 Food Of Love


 For a Lost Soldier --- strangely sweet if forbidden


 Formula 17


 Fucking Different (short collection) --- CANNOT find anywhere online!!


 Get Real --- not bad


 Get Your Stuff --- very cute, HEA


 Girls Will Be Girls


 Gohatto (Taboo) --- um, not real sure how it ended, kind of confusing


 Gone But Not Forgotten


 Head On --- strange, not sure what the point really was, a bit sad


 Hedwig and the Angry Inch


 I think I Do


 In the Gloaming --- told HIV/Aids no HEA


 Is it Just Me? --- silly, but cute


 Jeffrey --- HIV/Aids, HEA


 Judas Kiss


 Just A Question of Love --- very real and touching


 Just One Time (1999)


 Kick Off --- campy, odd-ball, some sweet parts, sort of HEA


 Kinky Boots


 Kiss Me Guido


 Kiss The Bride


 La Mission


 Lan Yu


 Latter Days --- very cute, HEA


 Leather Jacket Love Story --- want to see but can't find online


 Leo's Room --- sweet, sort of HEA


 Lilies


 Long Term Relationship


 Longtime Companion --- HIV/Aids HEA of sorts, well made, similar to And The Band Played On


 Love! Valour! Compassion! --- funny, bittersweet, sad, beautiful


 Love of Siam --- very engrossing and sweet


 Love Songs


 Luster


 Make the Yuletide Gay --- really cute holiday movie! HEA


 Making Love


 Mambo Italiano


 Mandragora --- cannot find with english subtitles


 Mango Souffle


 Maurice


 Milk


 My Beautiful Launderette --- tried to watch it. didn't catch my attention


 My Own Private Idaho --- odd, no HEA


 Mysterious Skin --- disturbing story on coming to grips with being a sexually abused child, well made, very realistic


 Oh Happy Day --- a bit strange, but really cute, HEA 


 One To Another --- strangely disturbing, but not bad


 Paragraph 175 --- documentary, touching and heart-wrenching


 Parabens


 Parting Glances


 Patrik, 1.5 --- want to see but can't find online


 Philadelphia (1993)


 Plan B --- HEA


 Plata Quemada (Burnt Money)


 Poster Boy --- interesting story on politics and homosexuality, HEA of sorts


 Prayers for Bobby --- won't watch it, suicide and how a religious mother deals with it


 Prick Up Your Ears


 Presque Rien (Come Undone) --- cannot find with english subtitles


 Priest --- not bad but I'd have liked a happier ending


 Priscilla, Queen of the Desert


 Prodigal Sons --- disturbing and strange


 Quinceanera --- a mix of english and spanish with no subtitles, can't understand enough of it


 Rainbow Boys/Right By Me --- cannot find online or torrent!!


 Redwoods


 Regarding Billy


 Relax... It's Just Sex --- funny, sad, serious, a bit of it all


 Rock Haven --- it's got its cute moments, but no HEA


 Role/Play --- cute, funny, HEA


 Save Me --- better than I expected, HEA


 Say Uncle


 Sebastian --- cannot find this one under this title, possibly the Adventures of Sebastian Cole, but not sure


 Seth et Holth


 Shank


 Shelter --- sweet, HEA


 Shortbus --- beautiful, sad, funny, compelling, deep, exploratory, provocative, SO not what I expected!

 Sommersturm (Summerstorm) --- very sweet, sort of HEA


 Sordid Lives


 Stonewall (1995)


 Straight Jacket


 Straightman


 Strapped --- weird but not bad


 Struggle --- sad


 Sugar


 Sunday, Bloody Sunday


 Tan Lines --- I'm actually at a loss to describe this except... fucked up ending to the relationship!


 Taxi Zum Klo (Taxi To The Toilet) --- um... weird...


 That's What I Am --- more about tolerance than anything


 The Best Of Boys In Love --- strange... just strange...


 The Big Gay Musical --- musical part is hilarious and the rest is very real and sweet


 The Birdcage


 The Boys In The Band --- tried to watch it but too campy and silly for my taste


 The Broken Hearts Club --- sweet and funny


 The Bubble


 The Celluloid Closet (Documentary)


 The Crying Game --- sad, no HEA


 The Curiousity of Chance --- very cute, sweet, HEA


 The Hanging Garden


 The Houseboy --- no HEA shown, but leaves you hopeful for one


 The Line of Beauty


 The Man I Love --- want to see, but haven't found yet


 The Man Who Loved Yngve


 The Mostly Unfabulous Life Of Ethan Green --- very nice but a bit weird, HEA


 The Singing Forest


 The Sum of Us --- several sad parts, but overall a good movie, HEA of sorts


 The Trip


 The Wedding Banquet --- it was ok. HEA but still...


 The Wolves of Kromer --- rather cute, sort of sad, sort of weird, HEA in a strange way


 Three 


 Times Have Been Better --- want to see, but cannot find with english subtitles


 Torch Song Trilogy


 To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar


 Trage Liefde


 Trick --- kind of campy, but cute, HEA


 Trio (three Michael J Saul shorts)


 True Love (group of short stories)


 Twist --- dark and sad


 Un Jour D'Ete (A Day In Summer)


 Velvet Goldmine --- not sure if it's a HEA or not, but still, very interesting


 War Stories


 Were The World Mine --- it was actually good! 


 Wilde


 Worried About The Boy --- about Boy George


 XXY --- didn't like it, no real resolution either good or bad


 You'll Get Over It --- very sweet, a coming out story with a HEA


 Yossi & Jagger --- interesting story, no HEA






SHORT MOVIES:


 (I've watched all of these. If there's no comment afterwards, it was an ok film. Most I watched on Youtube, but some were on other sites like Alluc, Putlocker, Dailymotion, etc.)


 41 Seconds --- hilarious


 Achilles


 After


 A Hundred and Eleven --- break up movie, but sweet


 Amor Crudo


 Basketball & Math --- kind of sweet


 Benny's Gym


 Boys Grammar --- kind of confusing


 Breakfast --- don't get it


 Café com Leite (Coffee with Milk)


 Chicken --- so sad


 Coffee --- funny and very cute!


 Connected --- don't get it


 Davy & Stu 


 Dear Friend


 Dish


 Doorman --- sad and a bit cruel


 Doors Cut Down


 Fair Play --- sad


 Gabriel & Leo --- very cute and sweet!


 Heart --- confronting his ex about getting married


 Heartland


 Housemates


 Into The Night


 James --- so very sad


 Judas Kiss --- strange and rather depressing


 Kali Ma


 Late Summer --- sad but very poignant


 Lucky Blue


 Park Bench --- looks good, but sad


 Protect Me From What I Want --- sweet, hopeful


 Omar --- being outed, sweet


 Rock Bottom --- another kind of don't get it


 Running Without Sound


 Safe Journey


 Secrets --- rather sweet, HEA of sorts


 Silver Road


 Stand Up --- excellent short on the power of standing up against bullying


 Summer


 Summer Blues --- sweet and a bit innocent


 Take Out --- kind of strange


 That Thing We Do


 The Burning Boy --- sad


 The Young Prime Minister 


 Thermopylae --- don't get it


 Trevor


 What Grown-Ups Know --- nothing happy


 Who We Are --- cute, HEA


 You Can't Curry Favor --- very romantic, HEA


 You, Me and Him























Monday, April 16, 2012

Work People

I think I mentioned in my last post about people I work with. Shallow, red-neck, homophobic... etc. I've had it shown to me this last week, thank gods, that not everyone is that way. Let me talk about two of them.

One, a guy, was working in my area a couple weeks ago. It's the first time I've spent an extended amount of time around the guy. I like discussions on unusual issues and held true to form. We talked about different stuff and music became one. As I'm a fan of Adam Lambert, I brought him up. Of course, the guy uses one or two derogatory terms... typical. In the general conversation, he brought up something that had happened to him. Let's call him Jim. Jim's in a bar, drunk as shit, talking to some guy. Then his brother calls him over and Jim is so drunk he only picks up a few words of what his brother is saying. Those words are "queer" and "sitting next to you". Then the guy he'd been talking to comes over and puts his hand on his shoulder and tries to continue their conversation. Jim knocks the crap out of him.

HOW does this make sense? This other guy hadn't done anything wrong. Jim also tells me about his uncle (with the disclaimer he'd NEVER do anything like this) and how he and his friends used to get guys they thought were gay to go camping or something with them. Then they'd zip them in their sleeping bag and beat them. Wish like hell I had more info cuz I'd sure as fuck call and inform their local police!! Unfortunately, I think this is stuff that happened many years ago. At least that's the impression I got.

And there is the first example. Now to the better one.

A new girl started last week. To start with, I thought I was being stuck with some bitch that was going to make my night miserable. I've seen what happens when you give someone a chance and open up a bit.

She explained it to me. I outrank her and as a new hire, they've been warned to be wary of us. (Sucks to work where I do). When another supervisor came in and she saw how I interacted with him, she thought I was ok. But then again, this is another supervisor I'm talking to, not someone her rank. Then another girl comes in, same rank as the new girl (call her Gayle), and I talk the same way with her. This makes Gayle open up a bit and we start getting to know each other. Her best friend is a gay guy (mine is a gay girl), she's Wiccan, I'm pagan (not a huge difference really), we understand each other SO well! We've both had the thought it is shocking we aren't related. I've found we differ on music a bit and on personal preferences. She's a dominant personality and I'm submissive. And she doesn't like guys in makeup... she says it's not right for a guy to be prettier than her... lol!!

It's amazed me that I feel I've made a friend!! But there's a catch. We work together. We have a "law" at work there can be no romantic/intimate relationships between co-workers. Unfortunately, this now seems to also encompass friendships to a degree. Camaraderie at work is already in the gutter... discouraging friendship among the staff does NOT help the situation.

Gayle's got her best friend coming down here too. I'd thought maybe getting to know her maybe we could hang out. With her friend coming, I could get to know him too. What if someone sees us hanging out? She's new and it could jeopardize her job. It's not like there's anything between us because neither of us swings that way and she's got a family. But I'm seeing what I thought would be a new friendship fail before it even starts.

It breaks my heart. I'm only around the people I work with. Who would I hang out with outside work, maybe go places with where I could meet new people? The answer is no one. I stay home. Alone. With 10 cats.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Strange Things

Yes, this post will ramble greatly.

I have a tendency to get attached to stuff. Back when I first started doing online chat, I was religious about being in the room at certain times and meeting with my friends. I've even attended "online" drinking parties. When I started with Catster, I was in there constantly. When I started with Facebook, again, I was in there ALL the time. I guess it's a type of obsessive issue. About a year ago, I found something called Yaoi. It's basically gay Japanese manga/anime. It's been years since I had any friends like that, but I always enjoyed the company of gay men. For the most part they have such open and enjoyable natures. Like everyone, there are moments of depression or anger, but in general I've always liked being around them. Finding this genre of writing thrilled me. Then a friend introduced me to the American version (sort of). Male/Male erotic romance. And here we go again.

I do NOT like romance because I always see it as something I can't have. I've never seen myself settling down, marrying, having kids, the whole nine yards like most girls. But, I'm still a romantic, of sorts, so I do want to read about it. M/M gives me the perfect outlet. I'm ok knowing I'll never have what I read, because, hey, I'm a girl, but I can enjoy the wonder of romance again. And I've thrown myself into it, deeply. Also, it got me to missing the circle of friends I used to have.

When I was in college, one of the girls I hung with was bi-sexual and most of the guys were gay. My best friend recently found a woman she's happy with as well, though in school she never revealed herself to be inclined that way. Kind of pisses me off because, straight or not, I had a little thing for her in college. It's those people I miss, or that type anyway. Open, friendly, accepting, fun... none of what I'm around these days. Most people where I work are closed minded, homophobic or just generally not accepting of things that are different.

True, most are ok with me. I'm not christian and that gives some pause, but they don't judge me for it. But I get strange looks when I talk about whatever I'm reading at the moment or watching-found SO many beautiful gay romance movies or shorts. And now my musical likes are coming into play.

This was my intro to Adam Lambert:



Purely by chance, I came across Adam Lambert. Gods, this guy is hot. And his music is wonderful!! This is the type of stuff I truly enjoy listening to. It's not depressing or disturbing. It's deep but fun, bouncy and totally enjoyable. The fact that I have a thing for his type doesn't hurt. Tall, lean, pierced, tats, makeup... ~sigh~ And him making out with that sexy as hell bassist is just too hot for words, though the bassist is straight. And there is my dream guy. Someone so secure in their sexuality, they're not afraid to do something like that. Tommy Joe Ratliff may wear makeup, he may kiss a man in public, but he's a better man than most I know. A man that doesn't follow what society says is correct, but does what he wants.

Only thing is, these men are few and far between. And even if I met one, I've got so many issues of my own, could I get him? Would I want to? How is it possible to want a relationship with a guy and yet be scared of the same thing? And I have no idea where this post is going really.

A friend of mine, who would be perfect if he were gay, keeps trying to convince me I'm worth something. I say "perfect if he were gay" because that would make him safe. I SO miss having a friend I can talk about anything with or act just any way around and not have to worry about anything being taken wrong. I adore my friend, but I'm not attracted to him. That makes me wary sometimes because I don't want anything I say or do taken the wrong way.

I only know one guy I can be this way with and he's... unavailable. Work prevents us from even being friends anymore pretty much. With us, the attraction goes both ways AND I can talk with him about absolutely anything. I miss him deeply. Lately, this had led me to really wishing I had gay male friends so I could have that closeness with someone again, even if not physically. I miss being me. I miss having the freedom to not care what others think or say. It's actually had me in tears a few times recently realizing exactly how lonely and pitiful I am.